Dare to Lead

Dare to Lead is a self-help book for professionals—especially those serving in leadership positions—by American researcher and lecturer Brené Brown. The text explores how to become a “daring” leader who motivates and inspires employees to develop their skills and fulfill their roles to the best of their potential.

Brown offers recommendations on how to heal dysfunctional or hostile workplace cultures to create a trusting and communicative professional environment. Brown argues that by accepting vulnerability and approaching their work with curiosity, open-mindedness and courage, leaders can create safe spaces for their colleagues to communicate honestly and collaborate more productively.

Brown, who is trained in social work and has a PhD in philosophy, bases much of her advice on her own research in professional leadership, while also weaving in findings from other psychologists. She provides anecdotes from her personal life and includes the perspectives of renowned leaders such as Melinda Gates to demonstrate how her tools have been successfully implemented in various workplaces. This study guide refers to the Kindle edition of the book.

Summary

Brown shares that she wrote Dare to Lead to combine her ideas and research findings from previous books into one volume which contains practical tools and advice for professionals. She argues that the best leaders are kind and courageous and that they focus on finding and developing their colleagues’ potential. She identifies ten toxic workplace behaviors—such as blaming others, avoiding candid communication, and being defined by failures—and describes how they manifest in the workplace. In contrast, she introduces the four key skills that will shape her book: “Rumbling with Vulnerability, Living Into Our Values, Braving Trust, Learning to Rise” (10).

In chapter 1, “The Moment and the Myths,” Brown addresses the myth that vulnerability is the same as weakness. Instead, she argues, acknowledging vulnerability is a courageous act that has enormous benefits for you as well as your workplace culture. She debunks other myths about vulnerability (e.g., it can be avoided, it requires complete emotional disclosure). In the following chapter, “The Call to Courage,” Brown makes the case for honest communication at work. She uses the term “rumble” to refer to meetings where staff feel able to discuss failures openly and vulnerably without shaming or blaming. She encourages the reader to “rumble” with their own staff, and to make sure that everyone communicates respectfully during these meetings. Brown also introduces the tool of “Permission Slips,” which are used in meetings to encourage thoughtful communication.

In chapter 3, “The Armory,” Brown discusses how everyone has their own emotional “armor” that they use to protect themselves. She argues that behaviors such as perfectionism, cynicism, and fear of taking risks are all ways that we try to protect our egos from shame and failure. Brown uses the analogy of armor to show that we cannot succeed without being vulnerable, even though it makes us feel exposed and means that we may sometimes fail. The author posits that armored or egotistical behavior in the workplace often results in “power over” dynamics in which management behaves in a controlling rather than collaborative manner. It can also cause “victim or viking” mentalities in which colleagues feel that they must beat each other, lest they become the workplace “victim” (91).

In chapter 4, “Shame and Empathy,” Brown explains that shame is a universal feeling that cannot be avoided. She says that the more we deny shame’s role in our psyche the more power it has over our actions. The more shame we experience, the more likely we are to develop our emotional armor and feel driven to hide our insecurities. Brown posits that empathy and self-compassion are positive ways to diminish our shame and refocus on genuine growth rather than work to mask our shortcomings.

In chapter 5, “Curiosity and Grounded Confidence,” Brown advises the reader on how to develop real confidence, which she contrasts with false confidence that is actually “posturing” or “arrogance” (165). Brown argues that genuine confidence emerges when we acknowledge vulnerability, work through failures, and develop self-awareness. She writes that growing up over-protected or under-protected can result in weak confidence, since sheltered kids often fear failure while others will struggle to build their skills and explore their potential. She writes that approaching issues with curiosity helps to build confidence, since you focus on discovering new perspectives rather than defending your position and staying in your comfort zone.

In Part 2, “Living Your Values,” Brown explains how to identify and uphold your own core values. She writes that we should consistently uphold our values whether we are at work or home, rather than compartmentalizing with different priorities. Skilled leaders not only identify values that are important for their workplace culture, but also give their colleagues specific guidance on how to live out these values in the office.

In Part 3, “Braving Trust,” Brown explores the issue of trust, which she calls a taboo topic in many workplaces. She advises professionals to use the BRAVING strategy to approach trust issues in a constructive way. This acronym stands for “Boundaries, Reliability, Accountability, Vault, Integrity, Nonjudgment, Generosity” (225).

Finally, in Part 4, “Learning to Rise,” Brown addresses the importance of helping young people learn to grow from failure and mistakes. She shares a few strategies for developing emotional resilience during stressful times. Brown concludes her work by encouraging the reader to participate in the revolution of courageous and positive leadership.